first chill-no-frills night i've had in a while.
guinness next to the ocean, garlic parm fries, great company, and getting hooked on iPhone puzzle apps.
i'm now seriously considering an iTouch. and i'll get to write it off on my taxes - whatuP!
then some Chuck and some menage-a-trois... laughs and vino'd.
and a fun, lengthy chat with a good friend who's many the miles away.

life is grand.
i love thursdays

some thoughts i wanted to capture...

i like seeing others who talk with their hands
i love wrapping gifts in unique and creative ways
planning surprises for people i care about gets me excited, but i rarely receive surprises
it seems i'm in great voice the mornings after a couple glasses of wine
had i been more tax-informed, i could have written off big deductions for '09... live and learn
wondering if i should buy an alarm clock or a long ethernet cable at best buy... decisions, decisions...
i'm itching to travel again, but taxes and paying rent keep me here...
i wish people would stop commenting on my weight
the summer heat has begun, and driving around with no a/c is a little rough
tutored my brother in math last week... hope he does well on his test today
i've had a pretty full and personally rewarding day so far... i deserve a nap before work from 3pm-1030pm

<3

all day long i wanted to update my facebook status again and again
instead i saved all the ridiculous snarkiness for a blog posting.
here goes!
advanced apologies for the typos... i'm 1/2 a vino bottle in!

facebook
[ What's on your mind? ]

Cat Masuda:
- 's patience is being used up way too early in the morning
- is now motivated to apply for two more jobs
- wonders if she's crazy for applying for two other companies...
- is reminded why she doesn't like Pizza Hut
- loves her current ABA kids and is sad that one of them is leaving in a few weeks...
- wishes she had time to eat dinner!!! 1/2 an apple does not suffice
- can't believe she served kids meals to four grown ups tonight. 4!!! >:^( grrr... eat freaking adult meals, you cheapos!
- ended the night on a good PPA because of those adult-ordered-kids-meals, haha
- is pissed that walmart didn't have the canon printer ink cartridges in stock!!!!!
- is grateful that the walmart sales associate told me she saw a commercial that walgreens across the street refills ink cartridges
- got spooked when the bicyclist zoomed by me while walking from walmart to walgreens
- is bummed that the ink cartridge refillers won't be in til 6am
- is happy she got to use one of her coupons on chocolate and found her mom's fave kettle corn at walgreens
- saw the macgrill cooks at L&L
- is stoked that the $5 barefoot moscato turned out pretty freaking sweet
- freaking full from L&L healthy garlic shrimp plate that's so unhealthy
- finished almost the whole damn bottle of moscato. urrrrgh don't feel so good, can hear heartbeat in my head
- is ready to pass out and wake up in 4 hours

good night, world.

hi xangans,

thanks to those of you who wrote to me in my last blog. i was falling into a really bad place, but i think i'm slowly finding my way out.
here's to another attempt!

its been a hectic several weeks - kaua'i opera express tour, uncle's funeral, things changing with my ABA job...
life is moving faster than i'd expected...
...then again, when does life move exactly how we want it?

there's been a handful of unfortunate, unexpected circumstances recently,
but it seems the fortunate ones are starting to pop up

its been a long monday, you know, monday, my supposed one day off.
pbltlbplbtltblpt

i've been pretty dang down over the past week or so.
also got sick with laryngitis and acute pharyngitis a few days ago, so that didn't help.
all i did was stay in my apartment and watch three seasons of desperate housewives while hacking up coagulated pieces of phlegm.
last night a buddy came over with Gamer on blu-ray - pretty kick ass to watch in high def!
nice change of pace.

after starting antibiotics, i felt worse on the second day. its day 3 now, and i'm feeling well enough to go to my first job appt.
but i'm not sure if i'll have enough energy to work a saturday night at mg.
given my starting time tonight, i have a feeling i'm gonna be stuck in the section i hate the most - two 6/7 tops and two booths.
for some reason i always end up gasping for air while trying to find my way outta the weeds.
did i really just write outta? ha
well, here goes the day.

i'm pretty bum blue about my financial situation atm.
either i need a roommate (something i don't want) or i'll keep making less than i owe monthly for rent and bills.
what a sucky situation!
it makes me not even want to work, and that is a big reason for my blah feelings.
oh well.
sink or swim... i'm kinda floating on my back right now. minimal effort to breathe in air.

this morning i watched some youtube videos that made me laugh,
and it brought back some of the old, spunky, sarcastic cat that once existed.

i miss her.

to my friends:
when you go out to eat, please tip 20% if the service was good.
if you're thinking of tipping 15%, think about the $1-$3 extra that you can spare to bump that 15% up to 20%.
tipping less than 15% when you had good service makes you look like a cheapo,
and tipping 10% or less means:
STAY HOME AND SAVE YOUR MONEY IF YOU CAN'T TIP PROPERLY!
or
ORDER YOUR FOOD TO-GO so you don't have to tip the person/people who helped you throughout your meal.

also,
if you pay in cash, please try to make sure you put in the correct amount of money before you walk out of the restaurant.
leaving $9 for your $17 tab is called STEALING!
c*nts.
you figure out the missing vowel.

it really rubbed me the wrong way tonight,
telling the table i'd be right back with the change,
and them telling me "that's all yours."
i trusted them and didn't even look at what they'd given me,
and only until after they walked out did i find myself $8.17 short of the bill.
EFF MINUS!

benefit of the doubt says they forgot to put a $10 bill in there,
'coz if not, that's just wrong.
who goes to a restaurant, drinks several mugs of coffee, eats dessert, and then doesn't pay for it all?
stoops.
ugh!

i'm so fed up with close-minded folk!!!
but i guess that's what comes along w/the food service job.
people from all walks of life stroll past my feet.
and so goes life.

oh my bejeezus!
hasn't been a lucrative weekend. really gotta scrounge these pennies.
tomorrow: two mini-opera shows, ABA therapy work, then --WAIT FOR IT-- a free night!
two glasses of menage a trois...
am i drunk?
*the world will never know!*
</reading blog out loud as i type it>

...<3 Chuck
for several reasons saved for a private blog.
---
paid my $9K+ in taxes off this past weekend... still owe my parents a couple thou... ouch!
here goes life.
can't wait to pay it all off.
i think i might leave HI after uncle sam stops beating me with the tax stick.

first off,
HAPPY WORLD AUTISM AWARENESS DAY!!!
i'm so happy autism awareness is spreading! we should be supportive of everyone, no matter what race, gender, or ability. autism pride!!!

second,
WHAT A NIGHT!!! this is my personal blog, so i'm allowed to vent my opinions here.
tonight at mac grill was awful! i've never had so many military-couples-who-think-its-okay-to-tip-10% in one night!
and tonight i was ON IT! i mean, really on it... i gave excellent service to every table i had tonight, and still got the 10%-and-less from the military couples!
i got to the point where i started to cringe when the red NavyFedCredUn. card glared out at me from the checkbook.
man.
luckily all the non-military tables i had tonight recognized my hard work and good service and tipped me 20%-40%, which saved me on the tip out tonight.
i think maybe some ppl from the mainland don't realize that in our restaurant, we work as a team, and that means we tip out all the staff - service assistants, hostesses, bartenders. and then we get the rest of what we don't tip out.
so giving us 10% when we've been catering to your every need and going above and beyond doesn't help anyone one bit.
bleh.
thank you to all the great guests who helped me not feel so disheartened by the cheapo diners tonight
and NO THANK YOU to the lazy ppl who don't help out with restocking the bev station all night.
*curtsy*

third,
i reaaaally want to run away with the circus! fingers crossed.

fourth,
my supervisor threatens to end her contract with us when we don't do certain things.
is it so wrong that secretly i hope that she terminates my contract with her?
not so secret anymore, i guess

fifthly (haha),
i'm SO STRESSED OUT BY SO MANY THINGS!!!
my two jobs give me so much stress, impending taxes stress me out too, and the realization that i make less than i need monthly freaking hurts my pride.
i'm really hoping that something magical will happen in the next several months.

sixth,
i'm sooooo SO SO tired of hearing everyone comment or criticize my weight.
YES, YES WORLD, I HAVE LOST SOME WEIGHT.
big whoop dee doo, i'm still alive, aren't i?
it's not my fault i don't have time to eat/don't have enough money to spend on nourishment.
i supplement my diet with as many healthy calories as possible:
almond butter, dried fruit, cheese, etc.
but given my busy schedule, jobs that keep me active for 5+hours, and lack of time to eat,
i can't help that i've shrunken down to this tiny figure.
so please,
unless you're going to treat me to a meal in the no-free-time i have,
no more talk about my weight please!
makes me feel so uncomfortable.

seventh,
i found a frozen meal in my freezer that i'd forgotten about!
SCORE!!! DDDD
7.5th, chateau ste michelle 2008 riesling is thebombdotcom!

that is all for now.
time to nosh and enjoy the wine.

<3,
your kitty,
cat

sometimes i wonder where my passion for life has gone.
it slipped away unnoticed somewhere during the hectic chaos last year.
between the court dates, p visits, lavish trips in attempt to get away from it all, and stress from school and two jobs,
i failed to hold onto that once-scorching fire that lit me up, the sometimes-unmanageable passion that drove me to accomplish all i have.

i'm tempted to offer a monetary reward, but i'm not so sure i want it back that bad.

i know i could turn a blind eye and pretend to let reality go unnoticed, but i have a hard time lying to myself about reality.